FAIR PLAY / SUBSTANTIAL JUSTICE

obama is left-handed!

Posted in Uncategorized by Ryan Locke on January 20, 2009

How could I have missed this?  Obama joins four of the last six presidents in being left-handed — Clinton, H.W. Bush, Reagan, and Ford.

One of the many curses of being left-handed — along with scissors, sitting next to right-handed people for meals, those pesky half-desks in stadium seating that are always on the right arm — is that we must shoulder immense power and responsibility.  We truly are the chosen people.

Why?

“It is possible that left-handed politicians are more strong-willed because they’ve chosen not to conform to a right-handed world,” said Jan van Strien, an expert on biological psychology at Erasmus University, Rotterdam.

Wrong.  It’s because left-handed people are a genetically advanced race of humans poised to take over the world.  Our day will soon come.  You’ll know because television and radio will fall silent, the air will crackle with the sounds of revolution, and we’ll finally get rid of all those damn scissors.

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